4/24/2012

WHY????? Why is my question tonight? The minute I start to feel somewhat normal I look around and realize my life is not normal and I hate that. I was happily married and was looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you and now that has been taking away? So why did it happen and why do things happen to good people? I look around this house every night when I finally get a few minutes to myself and its quiet I dont have my husband to talk to or or just sit in the same room with. I get so mad that I dont have that anymore. I get so tired of being the only parent in our kids life through the good and the bad and I miss being able to share the good and the bad of our beautiful children with you. Its just not fair. I am doing the best I can but I hate doing it alone I know that sounds selfish and I know I am not the only one that has been left behind to raise children and to live on this earth without thier loved ones but I am going through it right now and guess what it SUCKS!! I was looking at your picture today trying to remember what it felt like to hold your hand or to kiss your lips gosh dang it I want it back.I know I have to face the harsh reality that it will never happen that I will never get to hear your voice, to feel you next to me or kiss your lips but there are days and nights like this one I just dont want to face that reality I want to rewind time. So tonight I am mad, sad and dont want to face reality but the only thing I do know and feel is that I love you sooooooo much and I miss you soooooooo very much.

                                                                                        Love,
                                                                                        Tiffany